How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
