Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Vodka?
Forever.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
How does it feel to date your dad?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
