I wanna bring you to show and tell
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
He did a backflip because drugs
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