I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
