what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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