why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
