And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
