I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
True college students do jello shots in the library
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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