he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize