don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize