Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
