Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
ugly people sure do ruin things
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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