We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
