I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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