Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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