Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
