I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
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