If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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