He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
