fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
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