I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Randomize