Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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