Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
