East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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