After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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