its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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