Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize