THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
