this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
