nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
