smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Randomize
