The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
