I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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