So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize