rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Threesome in a minivan. New low
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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