Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
