This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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