Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I checked into jail on foursquare
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
you had me at cake vodka
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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