you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Sext me about skeletons
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
