the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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