haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize