Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
