We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
