she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
