Yo dont text me then not text me
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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