Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Randomize
