The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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