If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
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