i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Randomize
