It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize