yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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