lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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