I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
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