Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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